Letting go....

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

As I've wandered through this life I've found that one of the hardest things to do is let go.....especially when it is a family member. You can become so close and in love with someone that all they do can be forgivable....but once you open your eyes, the truth comes out and everything you thought you knew was nothing but lies. I had a woman in my life that I would have died for. She was a sister, a mother figure and a friend. I believed every word she spoke, she told me no matter what happens in life we will always be sisters.....and in the blink of an eye she shut me out. Love can be such a healing experience until someone rips your heart out...bleeding and still beating...laughing in your face. And to watch her torture everyone around her..people who love her...kills me. I'm so far away, yet I know everything that is going on...no one has to tell me...I just know. When you have such a deep connection with someone..you just know. I love my family (mom, dad, brothers) but unfortunately in this lifetime they have left me with an empty heart, an empty child hood....but the strength to move forward. I have so much happiness now and I can't share it with you...and that breaks my heart. You always told me how my life is no longer mine and my children always come first...and yet you are still trying to find yourself. Your life is right in front of you...and I hope you open your eyes before it's too late. What happened to being strong? What happened to being a cycle breaker? When did you become so weak? What is it going to take for you to remember whats important in this life? Or will L.A. just eat you up and spit you out just like any other no name loser?

This is me letting go....but the dolphins will always be swimming.

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